Hey, remember how I had a blog?

I'm back, baby. Prepare for an onslaught of posts. Probably.

Betty White is the queen of the universe.

And Tim Gunn is king.

Very funny, Theater of Youth

Theater of Youth is opening its 37th season with a production of the Boxcar Children. I'm sure this will be very helpful in preparing Western New York's children for their new lives as hobos.

Did you ever see the movie "It"?

ROAD SALT INDUSTRY IN CRISIS; JOHN MCCAIN TO SUSPEND CAMPAIGN IN RESPONSE

Being lucky enough not to have a home, a car made after 1995, any investments, stocks, equity or possessions with any real value, the economic crisis really hasn't had much of an effect on my life so far. I'm basically a clean pair of pants away from being classified as an "urchin," so I'm just sort of rollin with it and seeing how the whole thing pans out for the Haves.

But now, I see -- every one of us is affected:

The cost of road salt is going up and that's of particular concern for Erie County, which uses more of it annually than any other county in New York State.

"What we're finding for road salt is an increase in price for this coming winter of 30%," said Erie County Public Works Commissioner Gerard J. Sentz.

But, but without our space-age snow-obliterating tecmologies, we'll all end up like Jack Nicholson in the last scene of The Shining by November 15! We're as good as dead, people! AS GOOD AS DEAD.

Dear Luke Russert: Being from South Buffalo means never having to say you're sorry.

Apparently, Luke Russert, the luscious son of the late Buffalo booster Tim Russert who NOW HAS A GIG ON NBC NEWS I MEAN I KNOWS HE'S GRIEVING BUT COME ON HE'S 22 oh I'm sorry, where was I? So today he said that kids at UVA are smart, and therefore they're leaning towards voting for Obama.

First of all, lol, college kids voting. I was usually three beers in the bag by the time I remembered it was Election Day, and then a good Lifetime movie would come on and it was whoops, sorry democracy, catch you in two years.

But apparently it's not OK to just come out and say something like that, so he wrote a weird post on the MSNBC blog, in which he apologizes by saying:

I MEANT to say that many of the kids who go to UVA are from affluent, highly educated households who are leaning Obama and hence their kids lean Obama.

Um, what? So... you're saying... that... highly-educated... people... vote for... Obama. OK, just making sure.

Bottom line, here, Lukey: I've spent a good deal of time in South Buffalo, the place of your father's birth and still home to Big Russ. If someone calls you on something, just break a bottle on the curb and lunge at them until they concede! It seems more dignified than what goes on in the media, anyway.

Love, Me

ps Give me a call sometime.

We'll take what we can get.

LOL:

'Grey's Anatomy' references Kevin Everett's medical case in season premiere

Thursday's two-hour series opener of ABC's "Grey's Anatomy" has a local angle that should drive local viewership of the popular medical series even higher.

The medical treatment that former Buffalo Bill Kevin Everett received last season is referenced a few times in a plot line about an accident victim who suffered severe spinal injuries.

Everett isn't mentioned by name but the script mentions that therapeutic hydrothermia was used on "a Buffalo football player."

For more details, read a review of the program in Thursday's edition of The Buffalo News.

This was under the "breaking news" section. I do love him, though. Look at that shirt! And isn't his fiance a babe?

One day, I will have an original thought.

So, I thought I was pretty clever. The other day I was laying in bed, trying not to get up for work, and I thought, "hey, Sarah Palin is just like the mom from Bobby's World." LOLZ I r so funny with my mid-90s references. I shall surely blog about this, I thought.

First order of business: find an image of Bobby's mom. Let's start by Googling "Bobby's World."

Oh, son of a bitch.

Goose Love

A wonderful column by Nick Kristof about how geesez luv each other.

Congrats, Maddow: I love you

Hey, remember how I had a new blog? Then I didn't post for about 37 days. Well, I'm back, because I can't keep it inside anymore: I love Rachel Maddow.

Those of you close to me know that this is quite a reversal of my earlier feelings for the MSNBC pundit. Tom and I use to track how many minutes into Olbermann it took for Maddow to show up. It was generally between 6 and 11. She was just way too much on there, and Olbermann's smarminess didn't lend itself well to her wry sense of humor. They came off sounding schticky, like some warped political unfunny Abbott and Costello, but with a lesbian and a sportscaster.

So when I saw Maddow was getting her own show (directly following, natch, Olbie), my reaction was, of course, "MADDOWWW!!!" as I shook my fist at the sky.

Then I caught the first couple of minutes of her show one night, and I thought she was pretty calm and refreshing and fair-minded, especially right after the spittle-soaked rage of Olbermann. So I caught a little more of the next night, and then stupid Moe from Gawker wrote something confusing and ill-conceived about her being the first butchy gal on primetime cable news, and I found myself getting... defensive? Let's face it folks. I was in love.

Some things you may not know about my little news kitten:

• She was the first openly gay person to be a Rhodes scholar
• Her birthday is April Fools' Day!
• She met her partner when she (the partner) hired her (Maddow) to do yard work!

This election has not been so good for ladies. Poor Hillz got spanked and then along comes Moosey McBeehive to save us from our abortions and build us all a Bridge to Everywhere. The more people try to NOT talk about these women as, well, women, the more offensive the dialogue gets. But one special lady has come out on top this fall: my buddy, Rachel Maddow. Go, girl!

MSNBC replays 9/11 Today Show footage; confused grandmas everywhere freak out

Dear MSNBC: Thanks, but no thanks-- you really do NOT have to keep replaying the Today Show footage from the morning of September 11. You're making everyone weepy and on edge! And really, isn't the most important part of a traumatic event when you squash it down into a tiny ball of memories and tuck it away behind your medulla oblongata and not think about it until one day you're driving along in a different city from where the whole thing happened and it comes out and you lose control of the car?

Why can't you pay tribute in a more meaningful way, like our beloved Wonkette?

Buffalo: Cheap (Green) Bastards

Buffalo is leading the nation in increased light rail use, according to the American Public Transportation Association and the Buffalo News.

The city's hobos continue to express their indignation as countless young professionals and cheap ornery old guys crowd onto the Metro Rail, aka Hobo Town Inc. Also, my mom won't let me use it (due to aforementioned hobos.) Hobos.

Gossip Girl Recap

I have no fucking clue what is going on in this show.

Canadian Beanz: A Pictorial

Some thoughts on Saturday's Vegetarian Festival in Toronto and MC Chris concert in Buffalo:


This is me after a cup of tea, a cup of coffee, an hour drive to Toronto and twenty-five minutes of traffic to get off the QEW. Shit was getting serious. Then, luckily, we were there! Almost.

More traffic under some ominous cloud cover and Canada's adorable version of the Space Needle, the CN Tower. Aw. Look at them go! At this point, with rain threatening, my bladder pulsating and no end to the traffic in sight, I was beginning to wonder if this was the blunder of the year.

Pretty.

All I had to eat that morning was a handful of Mini-Wheats. So after that harrowing ride, I was ready to rock. And by "ready to rock" I mean ravenous, shaky and bitchy. I followed the scent of cumin to the Indian stand. It took awhile because it turns out hippies smell a lot like cumin.


Snack plate! Not pretty, but delish.

Curry combo! "Chicken" curry; chickpea (BEANZ) curry and basmati.

Indian soda! Tasted, um, like Pepsi. It was called "Thums up!"


This is from a Korean stand. Even though free samples abounded, I couldn't stop paying for food. Like this stuff: fried "fish" kebab; and a "fish" bun.

Money shot of the bun:


It was pimp.

Tentz full of hippiez, Indian people, Rastafarian guys and seitan.


Tom displaying our Sheese and vegan cookies. I didn't let him wear his "eat turkey be perky" shirt.


Back to the States and MC Chris. I forgot my ID and was forced to be the only 25-year-old straight edge there, or, ever.


Turns out, hanging out a bar for hours and not drinking? Kinda tough!

Here, if you squint, you can see MC Chris. He now has a beard and it makes him look kind of like a scary guy at a bus stop.

He was extremely hilarious. But then he kinda stood a bunch of fans up at the merch table? But Tom sent him a message on his message board and he answered! He was just chillin with Reggie and the Full Effect, turns out. All is forgiven!

god damn it

I've had Celine Dion stuck in my head for THREE FUCKING DAYS.

From the WGRZ.COM headline hall of fame

Turns out: it wasn't.

Bean- and Buffalo-related post for the day.

To reward me for going to see Celine Dion with her, my mom took me to Santasiero’s, one of the best Italian joints in Buffalo and probably anywhere.

Santasiero’s is a dumpy old building located between the ghetto, some rusty old factories and the stench hole that is Lake Erie. They have vinyl picnic-style tablecloths, skinny, crass waitresses and only one menu for the whole place pasted on the wall. It is the best shit of all time.

My earliest memory at Santasiero’s: I was probably six or seven, and my parents dragged my brother and I out of the suburbs and into there on a sweaty Saturday night, when the place is filled with old hairy guys in polyester and their bouffanted wives drinking lambrusco out of juice glasses. Actually, it’s always filled with people like that. The waitress wiped the previous customers’ table scraps — peas, broth, macaroni—off the table and directly onto the floor. I nearly passed out.

Now I am old and smart and I know exactly what’s up. And! Last night I discovered the pasta fagioli (spelled helpfully by Santasiero’s as “pasta fasoola”) is vegetarian. My mom has been selling me some jive about chicken broth for some time now, and I’ve always been too scared to ask the waitresses, who would probably throw me out on my ear. However, last night as Tom and I tore into the giant stack of bread, the old guy at the table next to us asked about the broth. “Just onions and garlic and oil,” the waitress said. My heart exploded. It comes with a little bowl of fried banana peppers.

Also their website is hilarious.

This weekend is the ultimate in nerding out.

Between this

and

this!!

I can’t really tell anyone what I’m doing this weekend. Side note: I have been led this whole time to believe that Reggie and the Full Effect is opening for MC Chris. Not so. Either way: I’m down with a little boot to the moon and jazz hands.

On Palin looking like Fey.

S: its hard to think of her as anything but the devil

Bean Lyfe

I am going to see Celine Dion tonight. I hope she swallows the Heart of the Ocean whole.

This blog will not be only about beanz.

But it will often be about beanz.

Like this. All hail mighty chickpea!